Hautemama of 2: Moms Big Move

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Moms Big Move

We have finally convinced my Mom, after a horrible summer of illness, that it's better if she moved to an Assisted Living Senior Apartment. I've been talking to her about it since January and she never would agree to it, saying she was fine and could handle herself living alone.

Well, take Parkinsons Disease and add in a flooded house and she's had it. She now knows that she can't handle her house by herself and she's just not safe anymore alone. My Mom has a form of Parkinsons in which she will never get the tremors but she falls without warning. She will get up to walk somewhere and for no reason, black out and just slump to the ground. She's probably fallen no less than 100 times in the last 9 months. She's suffered very little injury when falling, which has been a blessing but some of the falls required an emergency room visit.

I've learned a lot of things in the past 4 months.

1. Having a Power of Attorney does nothing when the adult you are taking care of can tell medical people that they want to live by themselves. You can only ask someone to move to an assisted living, you can't make anyone do anything.

2. Low Sodium in an older person is the scariest thing I've been through. It makes the person confused, mean, agitated, combative, halucinate, and just say all around crazy things. My Mom had low sodium and one day out of the blue became extremely agitated, refusing to go to the doctor, take care of herself, listen to anyone, etc. I couldn't even get her to go to the doctor to see what was going on. All this was happening in the middle of the flood restoration at her house and she refused to leave. She stayed in the middle of new flooring, painting, cleanup. She told the restoration guys she wanted her garage painted red (on a grey house), she wanted to charge up her car so she could do donuts in the yard (seriously-how strange is that request), she wasn't eating right at all (she only ate baked sweet potato fries-that's it) and she was generally pissed off at everyone, especially me.

By the way, there is nothing worse than hearing your parent tell you what a horrible child and person you were and are currently. I know she's sick and wasn't talking in her right mind but that is a self-esteem killer right there. If I hadn't had my husband and kids around, I don't know what I would have done.

3. Parkinsons Disease just sucks.

4. The guilt of having to move your parent into an Assisted Living is a killer. It's like sending your child off the kindergarten by themselves. I just want to make her friends for her and watch her all day and night. So hard.

I have decided that I'll do whatever it takes to make my Mom happy and feel content about moving. She's having to leave her furniture behind because it's too big so we bought all new furniture. Bright cheery furniture!